Baby on Board…and Likely to Be Decapitated?

Hi Readers — Here’s a note from today’s mailbox. The lesson? If you can dream up ANY DANGER, no matter HOW RIDICULOUSLY REMOTE, you can try to scare a parent. It’s easy! It’s fun! It’s our new national pastime! — Lenore

Dear Free-Range Kids: I’m currently pregnant with our first child, due in October. I’ve already aligned myself with Free-Range Kids, and I’ve been getting a kick out of how anti-Free-Range the pregnancy and infant industry is. It’s scary.

We had our first prenatal class, put on by a nurse at the local health unit. Awesome class. But they had some funny advice. Apparently it’s recommended NOT to have the Baby on Board signs suction cupped inside your vehicle as they become a projectile in an accident. And they can “decapitate your infant”. The nurse said that. Seriously. My husband and I laughed and now the other pregnant couples probably think we are child decapitators with a car full of projectiles (water bottles, sunshades and baby mirrors were also on the naughty list).

I get it. I do. No one wants to see a baby hurt because of something we didn’t think of. But why do we need to think of everything? The only time a tiny yellow sign will become a dangerous flying object is if you are in an accident. Maybe we should be more concerned about driving safely and less worried about what we have suction cupped to our windows. — Mom to Be