You Know You’re Making an Impact When…

Hi Readers! You know you’re making an impact when marketers start to try to make a buck off you, as did this one. A friend who runs a parenting magazine got this public relations pitch:

Dear _______:

There has been a lot of discussion about “free range parenting” — letting your kids wander to the park or take the subway alone to build independence. I’m wondering if you’re be interested in writing an article about how cell phone GPS locator services make it easier for parents to let go.

A recent study by the Pew Internet and American Life Project revealed that 75% of teens between the ages of 12 and 17 own a cell phone — and some 48% of parents use a cell phone to monitor their kid’s whereabouts.

On Tuesday, our company [I took out its name. I’m not giving them free publicity here!] will announce its latest cell phone Safety Plan for kids. In addition to other features, the plan offers unlimited online GPS locator services for parents. Would you be interested in speaking with a mom who relies on our company’s unlimited GPS locator services to make sure her 6th grade daughter is safe throughout the day? This parent perfectly illustrates the challenges faced by busy modern families. In an era where sending even 6th graders to the park without an adult can feel risky, GPS locator services are giving kids greater freedom and parents much-needed peace of mind.

Please let me know if you are interested in talking to our CEO and this parent. Thanks, I look forward to hearing from you.

Hi — Lenore here again. Grrrr! Only with kiddie GPS does a parent have ANY peace of mind? Otherwise, the mom is constantly worried that her 6th grader is in harm’s way? Otherwise, letting her 6th grader play in the park is too dangerous? And how does a GPS prevent anything “terrible” from happening, anyway, you fearmongerers out to make a buck?

I understand how Free-Rangers can embrace cell phones some times. My kids have them now and it’s helpful to connect, from time to time. But I am not tracking them throughout the day and I sure don’t think I need to that, for me to be a “good” parent or for them to be “safe.”

So no free publicity here, guys! Go stalk parents someplace else! — L.

New Technology May Allow Future Kids to PLAY OUTSIDE

Hi Readers! Afternoon fun (yes, ’tis a joke), thanks to brilliant Brian Briggs at bbspot.com:

Motion Control Advances Mean Future Generations Could Play Outside

by Brian Briggs

Recent advances in motion controller technology as exhibited by Sony’s PlayStation Move and Microsoft’s Project Natal reveal a future where newer generations of gamers could play things like sports or in places like “outside.”

Football?“These technologies show that we’re not far off from more active children,” said futurologist Ben Carlson. “The evolution has been rapid. First controllers vibrated, then the Wiimote simulated bowling, and now Project Natal has us jumping around the living room. At this pace kids could be playing outside by 2015.”

Game companies have remained quiet about any future technologies that might have kids playing outside, but one Sony engineer did hint that “things were happening.” And from Microsoft, the company behind motion capture controller Project Natal, images have been circulating the Internet showing a teenager throwing a football though its authenticity has not been verified…

Click here, for the rest of the piece.

For The (Lobotomized) New Parent Who Has Everything

Hi Folks and look! It’s the Itzbeen Baby Care Timer!

How long has it been since you changed your baby? Don’t go by smell or wailing — so old hat. Simply check your batttery operated,  pocket-size “Itzbeen.” It’ll tell you how long!

Speaking of which: How long since you fed the little bugger? Don’t listen for hunger cries. Don’t try to think back several whole hours. What are you, some kind of genius freak? Check a piece of technology instead! Surely you can find your  Iztbeen. It’s right…um…well, I thought it was right by the pacifier. Wait. Where’s the pacifier? Come to think of it, where’s Zoe?

Gee, this Itzbeen sure is helpful and to think, for just $24.99 we can now cede all parental instincts and obligations to a thingy! How did 200,000 years of homo sapiens struggle along without it?

Oh wait! I remember! We used our eyes, ears, hearts, brains and common sense!

How quaint. — Lenore