Kid Streaks at Football Game, Now Could Be “Sex Offender”

Hi Readers: Yes, one of two kids who streaked at his local high school football game could now be required to register as a sex offender. Same list you’d find Jaycee Dugard’s rapist on. But, hey, it’s only for 10 years!

Only 10 years of not being allowed to live near a school or park. Only 10 years of being turned down for most jobs. Only 10 years of being seen by anyone checking the Sex Offender Registry as a guy who regularly goes around exposing  himself to minors.

These registry rules are as ridiculous and inflexible as the rule that would have sent the Cub Scout with the fork/spoon/knife off to two months of reform school for what was clearly a minor offense, if an offense at all. The over-the-top penalty was no doubt cobbled to keep kids “safe.”

They sure are safer now. All hail inflexibility! — Lenore

30 Responses

  1. This sort of incident feeds the same problem that created the diversion from common sense. The judicial system is over burdened with case load. To expedite, they attempt to classify too many, in reality, unique circumstances in an attempt to be more efficient. In the end, the lack of detail and sense in the legislation for all the possible variety of similar offenses, just causes more burden on the system. The bureaucracy feeds its own problems and it just grows worse.

  2. what?what! that’s ludicrous! don’t people streak all the time? i though it was a spend-the-night-in-jail-get-fined-go-home-get-smacked-by-your-mother(roommate, sober friend) and secretly brag to your friends on the phone type things. not a friggin disaster! my god. taught those kids a lesson huh? freedom of (admittedly stupid)expression and (stupid) traditions will get you dead in five years by way of some overzealous registry checking parent with a ..mob?baseball bat?gun? magic tornado surviving house?wood and a lit torch? deadly bible??

  3. Hang on, people (M/F) streak in cricket games in the UK almost every year and run across the field stark naked on live sports TV (I don’t know why this is but I’m guessing it’s probably to alleviate the boredom, cricket games are loooong) This is almost a tradition in the UK, as are the careful news replays with policemen holding helmets over the streakers private parts.
    Why on earth is it suddenly time to persecute people for this?

  4. There is a tradition at my college where, right before 1st semester finals, kids to a Naked Quad Run, wherein they run around the quad in front of the freshman dorms stark naked, save the sneakers and scarves. I was one of 100s who ran (actually, i did it twice, freshman year and junior year) and while many disagree with it, its all in good fun. And is in no way a sexual crime!! I could not even imagine all of us being labelled sex offenders for that. Granted, there aren’t any younger people around but some college freshman are techincially minors at 17 years old.

    Poor kid.

  5. The obvious next step is to force all the parents and students in the stands to also register on the sex offender registry, they looked at a naked minor. Some of them may have applauded or laughed. Think of the children!

  6. Streaking was a fad in the 1970’s. I remember a promotion back then when Subway sandwich shops only had about a dozen stores. This may have just been done by only 1 or 2 stores for a very short time if maybe a week, and not approved of by the main office, but they offered a free sub to anyone that streaked into the store.

    A few years ago some statues in Washington D.C. were covered up because their nudity offended some self-righteous politicians. What’s next, putting artists, sculptors and Ray Stevens for writing the hit song “The Streak” on the registry as well? (He also wrote “Everything Is Beautiful”)

    If the registry was retroactive, then it would be easier to list the people that didn’t do anything wrong when they were young. The closest I got was to make some yellow snow behind a strip mall because there were no public restrooms open at night.

  7. @Nicole
    I went to college football games with my dad all the time as a kid, I don’t think it’s uncommon to have little kids there. It would not be hard at all for prosecuters to stretch streaking a college game into “a crime against children” even without 17 yr-old frosh…

  8. Whatever happened to letting the punishment fit the crime?

    My parents brought me to see Equus when I was still in high school, and that show involves a naked man and a naked woman trotting around the stage for a few minutes. (for those who don’t know the play, it’s actually a truly relevant part of the plot). Guess we better lock my parents up for exposing a minor to such horrible indecency. (For the record, I personally think there is little LESS sexual than a naked man running – it’s more ridiculous than sexual…)

  9. You know what always gets me about these kind of incidents is there is always one person quoted as saying, “I don’t want to have to explain to my kid…” and fill in the blank.

    What’s so freaking hard about it? If my kids saw someone streaking I would just tell them they are being stupid and think it’s funny to be naked in front of everyone. End of discussion.

    My kids wouldn’t even have asked. They would have rolled their eyes, hid their faces, made fake gagging noises or just laughed. I’m sure it would have been a hot topic of conversation for weeks afterward but in no way would it have traumatized them.

    You know what I don’t want to have to explain to my kids…how this country has lost all common sense in just 2 generations.

  10. This also reminded me of an incident yesterday. Me and a friend were sitting in the gym of the local PS watching our girls have a gymnastics class.

    At some point (and I’m sure she will kill me for mentioning it) she went to pull off her sweatshirt to give to her daughter and her t-shirt stuck to it. Luckily she noticed before yanking both off of her body because she was braless and there were about 30 kids in the gym including about 8 little boys (around 11 years old) gawking at the girls in the class.

    We were laughing about it but she mentioned next thing we would know she would be arrested and put on the sex offenders list. Sadly that could have happened…for accidentally flashing a bunch of middle schoolers.

  11. Why don’t we start petitions for every one of these kids? So few people see this blog.

  12. I wonder what would have happened if we had these dogmatic sex offender laws when I was a kid. My grandparents bought me several books about art ( with plenty of naked men and ladies) and biology ( which included diagrams of sexual organs and also a photo of mating rabbits) as they wanted me to have an appreciation for the arts and science. I guess these days they would have been arrested for giving “indecent materials” to a minor.

  13. A brief introduction to the revised American newspeak:

    public nudity = sexual exploitation

    children = victims

    fun = trauma

    stupidity = malice

    The Party appreciates your continued dedication to the protection and welfare of our nation’s victims. The Ministry of Responsible Safety encourages you to report any known detractors to their rapid-response SWAT line immediately at 555-9292.

  14. The United States is notoriously uptight about nudity compared to the rest of Western Societies. This is absurd and it devalues any usefulness of sex offender lists.

  15. @Meagan – sorry it wasn’t clear – it wasn’t at a sporting event. Takes place at 10pm at night on the residential quad (lawn).

  16. So the children in the crowd were harmed in some way by seeing a naked male human? Running over there? Not touching them? Not threatening them? Just… being naked? Over there?

  17. Amber,
    I was an Army medic, and had some medical books. My godson’s wife came unglued because I had some books with “pictures of people with their clothes off”, it didn’t do any good to point out that some of those people in the medical books also had their skin off too.
    Somewhere along the way, all my medical books “disappeared”.

  18. Someone in my grad class did that and they weren’t allowed to graduate with us (ie, attend the ceremony and festivities). While I thought this was a bit harsh it sure doesn’t come close to this punishment!
    Something like this isn’t going to make the person “think” about their actions. It’s going to ruin them for life! ANd the spectators will NOT be ruined. This is not fair at all!

  19. “You know what I don’t want to have to explain to my kids…how this country has lost all common sense in just 2 generations.”

    I struggle with that all the time. My kids (10, 13, and 17) are more mature and sensible than most of the “adults” we run into.

    So how can we get Americans to stop this ridiculous nonsense? How do you convince someone who has been deeply programmed that “nudity = sex crime” that they are wrong?

    Maybe all of us sensible people should start streaking at every sporting event we can. When 8 out of 10 Americans are on the registry, someone might take a look at what the registry is really supposed to be about.

    Either that, or every American needs to be required by law to live for at least one year in a European country. Once you spend time in a land where the nudity-fear, pedophile-fear, security-fear, and other nonsense ISN’T, when you get back to the USA it all looks so utterly ridiculous that you can’t stand it.

  20. This is so awful. I love this country but I feel our freedoms are only talk and no substance. The fear here makes me insane! Europe, here I come.

  21. Actually, if the new federal “Adam Walsh Act” becomes law, these kids might be on the registry for life.

    Researching the 1991 Texas registration program, SB 259, shows that originally registration was 10 years in Texas. The problem is that once they started doing thing RETROACTIVELY, what started as 10 years turned into lifetime registration.

    This undermines the stability of law…because we think we are safer.

  22. When I was a kid I would have thought streaking was absolutely hilarious and thrilling! I used to just be cracking up at museums with the cupids and nude statues. Apparently my parents found my behavior highly amusing, as did the other patrons.

  23. So, legally, how would you differentiate “streaking” and “flashing.” Effectively streaking is a silly activity, but flashing is used to intimidate and harass people. And yes, I do consider it harassment if, as happened this week, a man drops his pants and underwear in front of me at the door of the children’s museum.

  24. I got flashed as a kid and found it scary. Streaking is done in large crowds as a dare, not in front of one or two girls waking down the street. Very different scenarios, one being personally intimidating at a close distance, and the other being impersonal and from a considerable distance. Both fruit, but apples and oranges.

  25. Ashley and Jan have nailed it…it is a matter of intent. The intent of flashing is to either to frighten or cause sexual arousal (the later being extraordinarily unlikely for the flashee but perhaps true for the flasher). Streaking is a silly, immature stunt at worse or in Oregon on very rare occasions “an expression of free speech.” The intent of such a stunt is to provoke laughter, get attention, or at worse, cause mild surprise…not sexual arousal or fear. Better to ignore the streaker but arrest the flasher.

  26. The kid has not been labeled as a sex offender yet. There is still SOME common sense in Minnesota. Remember they DID elect an ex pro wrestler as their governor (as opposed to the action hero WE have here in Cali)

    Anyway we should take context into consideration. But the thing about laws is that they pretty much black and white. When we start adding in shades of gray and trying to interpret , then charges and accusations of unfairness get thrown about. Perhaps we should just do away with sex offenders registries all together?
    If someone hurts or molests a child they go to jail. FOREVER.
    If they never get out we don’t need to be concerned about if they live near a school or a park right?

  27. Yes, here is yet another non-violent criminal forced to register as a “sex offender” in America. It’s no wonder why the registry is overpopulated with about 700,000 people now.
    This certainly proves that not everyone on the registry is “dangerous”, as sensational news networks keep telling us.
    Lenore, we who support reforming these backwards laws appreciate all you do to inform the public about the danger involved with fear-mongering. Truthfully, it’s the corrupted media and politicians who should be feared, not kids streaking on a football field!

  28. what’s next? teenage girls w/ too short of skirts or half tops are going to be on this list too? And the teenage boys that wear their pants half way down their butt? I’m thinking the registry would be easier to read if it were the “non sex offender registry”

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